I had a somewhat familiar and peculiar (but not unpleasant) feeling as I enjoyed these scenes in this post on this chilly evening in Warsaw.
The ‘somewhat familiar’ feeling is something I have experienced many times. Perhaps not everyone who moves frequently gets this feeling, but I usually do. It’s kind of like a spatial nostalgia and simultaneous disconnect. It usually comes at a time when plans to leave are crystallising, and in an unexpected and unplanned moment, it’s like the metaphorical umbilical cord to place is snipped. It doesn’t mean the connection is gone, just changed.
The more peculiar (but not unpleasant) feeling is related to this ….I don’t even know if there is a word in English. It’s not nostalgia but something related, a kind of parallel yearning or awareness of something one is not fully ingrained with, mixed with deep sentiment.
I realized today that when we were scouting for homes in Warsaw 3 years ago, the relocation agent had (the day after we viewed the apartment we currently live in) brought me and my kids to this neighbourhood for lunch in between home viewings. Walking with my daughter early this evening to the play area at Royal Wilanów, we passed the cafe where she had taken us. I now remember as we sat there and were discussing the neighbourhood where my family and I have now lived for almost 3 years.
‘You know what they call that neighbourhood?’ She asked.
I shook my head.
‘Murder,’ she said.
Oh great, I thought. But after some exchange, I understood it was ‘Mordor’
It wasn’t until several months later that I fully understood the context and history of that place’s nickname. I have now lived in ‘Mordor’ for nearly 3 years. It is also one of my case study areas for my dissertation research for a PhD program I began in Warsaw in 2022.
The area I snapped this photo earlier today in Wilanów is also part of one of my case study areas, albeit not as a significant one, but not due to a lack of interest. In fact I’m quite interested in this area.
During my time in Warsaw, in casual dialogue with many residents as well as more structured dialogue for fieldwork interviews with many experts, I got a good little view into the rather polarising nature of the area and the strong feelings it evokes for many.
I settled in Warsaw, and my research, without bias to specific areas. Everything was new to me. However, as I explore in one of my current papers in production, I inhabit my field of research. Warsaw is a city I came to with interest to study (its spaces), acknowledging my limits as a person with no prior context or relationship with the city.
Jonas et al. (2015) note in the preface of ‘Urban Geography: A Critical Introduction’ that ‘being a critical urban geographer is not about being impartial or just reporting objective facts’ but rather about being part of the (urbanized) world that we study and also precisely about being partial‘.
I watched these scenes this evening, of my younger child in spontaneous and highly dynamic play with new friends in the play area at Royal Wilanów. I sat there, utterly in love with how happy she was. This is what childhood fun, neighbourhood play, and spontaneous connections are all about.
While I don’t regret our chapter of life in Mordor, this spontaneity of free play and connection is one thing lacking in the neighbourhood we experienced, which is home to many families with young children but dominated by a development trend that prioritizes privatizing amenities such as play spaces inside the gated developments.
I was on cloud nine watching my daughter with all her spontaneous new playmates and also observing the broader scene of many teens running around the area on their own Sunday adventures and many other young children playing in the area while their parents enjoyed coffee and snacks (or more substantial meals) in the variety of eateries surrounding the space.
Today I felt my ‘farewell tour’ to diverse spaces of the city begin. These are not only sites of research to me but also for my family, spaces of activity and social connection – sometimes even just spontaneous and passing- but meaningful.
